Full Circle - Day 18

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Day 18

Viola was startled awake. Rolling onto her side, she watched as Ivan thrashed about in the bed. Sighing, she reached for the lamp and turned the light on. “Ivan,” she called out, shaking him gently. Nothing. Shaking him a little harder now, she continued to call out his name. This was the fifth time this month that he had had a nightmare. All he would ever tell her was that each dream was exactly the same every time.
“Ivan,” she said, giving him one final nudge. “wake up.”
Ivan tossed and turned for a moment before sitting straight up in the bed. “Oh thank God,” he whispered, sweat pouring from his face. He looked over at Viola and said nothing as he pulled her into his arms and held her tightly.
Viola held him quietly for a moment. This time he seemed to be really shaken up. She had never seen him react quite this way before. “Ivan,” she began, hesitantly. “I think maybe it would help if you talked about it. If not with me, then with someone… anyone.”
Ivan shook his head as he lovingly rubbed her tummy that was stretched to capacity with their twin daughters. Leaning over her, he kissed the babies that were to be born in just two weeks. “Hello, Victoria,” he whispered. “Hello, Camille. Daddy loves you both so very much.”
Viola felt her heart do a leap. This was new to her. In the entire thirty-six weeks she had carried the babies, he had never once showed an ounce of emotion, good or bad, toward the babies or the pregnancy. She had even been convinced that he viewed them as nothing more than a sizeable tax deduction. “Ivan, this is wonderful, but I have to ask… what’s gotten into you?”
Ivan laughed as he lovingly gave her tummy another kiss. “Viola, I don’t know if I could ever explain it all to you. Let’s just say, I’m awake… I’m alive… and I love my family- perfect or otherwise. I’m so sorry that I didn’t make this experience as special for you as it should have been. I can’t change that. But I promise that things are going to be different now. And it starts with this… I too, want our babies to be born in the hospital.”
Viola gasped. “Oh Ivan, are you sure?” She could hardly believe what she was hearing. From the moment they had shared with Ivan’s mother the fact that they were having twins, everything changed. She had somehow become in charge of all of their prenatal visits and had strictly advised them to tell no one that there were actually two babies instead of just one. Viola had asked repeatedly why Ivan had gone along with his mother and insisted that they do exactly as she instructed. But he never took the time to answer her. So now to see him make such a huge decision without first consulting his mother, was tremendous.
Ivan laughed at the shocked look on her face. “I am beyond sure. And I know it’s quite late in the game, but in the morning, I am going to make some calls and get the best obstetrician in this state to care for you and the babies. And after breakfast, we are going to take a tour of the best hospital and get you all registered in. I want everything to be perfect… for you,” he added softly.
Viola beamed. “Thank you so much, Ivan. I’m not sure why, but I feel like this is going to be really good… for all of us.”
“More than you know,” Ivan whispered into her neck as he held her in his arms. “More than you’ll ever know.”
THE END
We hope you have enjoyed this PAJAMA SHORT, ‘Full Circle’ in its entirety. Please share your comments and thoughts with us about this story.
And be sure to look for the next PAJAMA SHORT to be featured on approximately December 1,2008.
Our next selected story is ‘THE WISH’
If you have ever wished you could change one thing that has happened in your life, this story is for you.

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Full Circle - Day 17

If you are new to this blog, start with the first post (Day 1). Happy reading and don't forget to leave your comments.

Day 17

The room, if possible, became even quieter… still. It was as if no one even dared to breathe. Victoria gasped. “No,” she whispered, “you said she died because I had turned up the thermostat. You said the heat caused her organs to shut down. Didn’t you just tell me that?” Her eyes pleaded with him for some sort of explanation.

Ivan shook his head. He couldn’t imagine that his heart could hold any more pain or guilt than it did at this exact moment. “Yes, Victoria, I did tell you that. That’s what I told all of you. But I can’t… I can’t let you continue to be the one that everyone hates and fears. I turned the thermostat up. I told your mother and sister that you had done it.”

“But why?” Victoria asked, tears falling freely down her cheeks. ‘‘Camille was already dead.’’

Ivan looked away now. “I… I knew how attached you all were to Camille. I knew her death would be difficult on all of you. But especially you, Victoria. I realized you were not going to be able to cope with her death rationally. At that time, you became a liability to me. I… I was afraid.” He paused. “Afraid you would maybe tell someone. There was too much at stake. I couldn’t let that happen. You have no idea how messy that would have been. Not just for me, for all of us. Camille was the secret we all kept.”

“Because you made us keep her a secret, Father,” Alexandria snapped.

Ivan shook his head. “The reasons why were never important. Things were on the verge of becoming very complicated. Very, very messy. I had to do something. I had to find a way to get Victoria out of the picture. She was emotionally unstable and potentially a threat to this family. So I had to present her to both of you as an actual threat to this family. I had to make you look at her differently. I had to,” he added, grimly.

This news took everyone by complete surprise. Viola had always believed she knew all the details of that night. Although she had never personally viewed the tapes, Ivan had insisted it would be far too painful for her, he had given her a brief and very believable explanation of what happened that night.

This new revelation from Ivan was almost as heartbreaking as Camille’s passing. How dare he do this to the family? How dare he use them as pawns in his very own game of life. She glared at him now. “You did this for your own selfish reasons? You tore our family apart. We had just lost one daughter and you had to take Victoria away from me too? How could you?” Viola turned away. She couldn’t bare to look at him now. No one could. So no one noticed when he slipped his foot under the bed and slid the gun out.

Reaching between his legs, Ivan picked it up and held it.

All the movement caused Viola to turn to him again. Her eyes widened in disbelief when she saw the gun in his hand. “Oh God, Ivan!” she screamed, jumping up and rushing over to her daughters. “Would you really kill your own daughter?” Protectively she wrapped her arms around both of them.

Ivan laughed. But it was a laugh filled with contemplation and weariness. He looked across the room at the three of them huddled together, frightened of him. At that moment, he knew his heart had just made room for the last bit of pain it was able to hold.

Looking down at the gun, he traced his finger along the length of it. “I would never do that,” he said, still looking at the gun and not at his family. “I’m really not the monster that you all now believe me to be. I’m just tired. I don’t know how to do things any other way. I am who I am. I am a Van Cort… Only the strong can survive.”

And with that, he placed the gun to his temple and pulled the trigger…

Think it’s over? Not quite. Catch the final installment of THIS story in three days. You don’t want to miss the ending!!!